![]() ![]() No bones about it, Painkiller's AI is straight up bad. Well, except when they can't, because the secret to stopping the armies of hell dead in their tracks is actually a well-placed wall or a particularly tricky staircase. Sure, there are gobs of different enemy types (including a handful of new ones specific to Hell & Damnation), but they all essentially do the same thing: run straight at you. Problem is, that's basically the whole game. Admittedly, I'm not much of a baseball fan, but I'm pretty sure that's exactly how it works. Instead, Painkiller's a lot like baseball: enemies come straight at you with zero regard for their own safety, and you send them careening through the air in hilarious head-over-heel tangles of detached limbs. There aren't any order-barking soldier men or moments where control's yanked away from you because the developers desperately want you to watch the coolest explosion in the history of explosions. ![]() Initially, blasting endless hordes of brainless baddies with Painkiller's totally wild arsenal is a refreshingly pure experience. I'll take stake guns and shuriken rifles and kneecap-seeking saw blades and chainguns that are also rocket launchers and countless insane alt-fire modes any day of the week. ![]() You can stow your modern military arsenals that are just as likely to make me die from boredom as they are to bring down my enemies. First, though, the good: shooting things in Hell & Damnation feels downright magical. Worse, there are some super disappointing omissions from the 14-level campaign (most heartbreakingly, the original Painkiller's amazing final level) that make it difficult to recommend this one over the far more comprehensive – not to mention cheaper – Painkiller: Black Edition. It felt old back then, and it feels even older now. We are, after all, talking about a hodgepodge of levels from a game that was already mired in the sticky swamps of nostalgia when it first came out in 2004. But it's not all roses and daisy field graveyards. And that's actually saying a lot, given that the series has taken countless twists and turns for the worse since original developer People Can Fly headed for greener pastures with Bulletstorm and Gears of War: Judgment. It's just like you (probably fondly) remember, but a bit prettier. Here, above all else, is what you need to know: this is Painkiller. ![]()
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